Fragile.....

.....we rarely are able to go out...basically, three destinations are available these days...
MGH for infusions and tests, Walgreens pharmacy for the myriad of prescriptions that my body needs to continue to function in an acceptable manner, and last....yes, Starbucks...some places are the equivalent of comfort food for the psyche.....

I think about David. He has cancer as well. He never talks about his cancer..He never seems to think about his cancer...He just wants mine to go away....

This afternoon he convinced me to come out in the car to get some air and pick up some pills...we appended a Starbucks visit....for fun..

I take a seat while david orders and acquires our special drinks..

...my mind starts to churn with my stomach...I think about how much this man loves me...How I just cannot go...

..I can't keep the tears back and as I look up I see that David has noticed I'm crying and comes to me..

.."you're thinking, aren't you?"...

..he knows and I know the odds.......DAMN!

..but I am strong.."like bull"...

I should never have gotten this..where..how...who...what???........no answers..

..I can and I will beat this...No question......"not everybody dies from this..."

David smiles at me so much......."Soon, David, this too will be just a memory and we will be happy once again...."

I love this man of mine....He tries so hard.....so hard....

...Grace...David brings her forward..She knows I can kick this...she knows my strength....that strength is something my daughter shares with me.....

..Sunday washes over us like a huge, warm blast of air....

..newspapers....fire in the fireplace....cats curled up next to a warm arm...wiener dogs sleeping and loving us with their wiener dog eyes......

...funny papers..sooo funny...

..and NO THINKING.....

promise